Wednesday, 17 December 2014

Sex ?? Rather call it Making Love ...

YES or NO to Pre-Marital Sex

It doesn't matter for how many times we deny to accept this truth and treat it as a taboo and claim to spoil our culture and heritage. It really doesn't matter. Because Indian root and culture has never shown the back to this natural truth ... SEX ... Rather I should call it as Making Love...

If anyone digs the Indian History into deeper level, then it will be soon discovered that Indian played a significant role in the history of SEX. Indian literature and temple sculptures were highly influenced by this natural flow of being united. For more information you may like to read the Wikipedia link.

Khajuraho Scultpture

Even if we go on reading the Ancient Hindu stories, we can find that it was not that rare at that period too.

Story 1 : Story of Shakuntala and Dushyanta 

Shakuntala was the daughter of Sage Kanva and was married to King Dushyanta as per Gandharava Vivav system (which implies to LIVE IN relationship as per today). They made love before the so called social marriage and thus Baby Bharata was born.

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Story 2 : Story of Kunti and God Surya

Karna was the son of Kunti and God Surya. Before getting married to Pandu, Kunti had given birth to the son of God Surya. Thus this story too shows the pre-marital sex.

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Gandharva Vivah 

According to Gandharva Vivah has been stated as 

Gāndharva Vivāha in Ancient Hinduism

Hindu texts catalog eight means of varying degrees of acceptability of acquiring a bride. Gāndharva vivāha is one of those. In this type of marriage, a woman selects her own mate. The two consensually agree to live together. Sensual passion drives the consummation of their relationship, which didn’t require parental or societal consent. In The Mahābhārata (Anuśāsana Parva, 44), Bhīṣma tells Yudhiṣtra that in gāndharva vivāha a father, regardless of his own preferences, gives his daughter in marriage to a person she has chosen and who reciprocates her sentiments. In narratives such as the story of Ṥakuntala and Duṣyanta, wedding follows a romantic union. In other words, premarital sexual courtship was allowed in gāndharva vivāha.Even though later texts portray gāndharva vivāha as the norm among the celestial beings called Gandharva, it probably originated as a form of courtship among the Ārya tribes in the Gandhāra region (modern day Kandahar in Afghanistan) in ancient India.

Several Hindu texts deemgāndharva vivāha less desirable than some other forms of marriage. However, The Mahābhārata (Ādi Parva, Sambhava Parva, 73) and The Kāmasūtra (3:5-29-30) opine that gāndharva vivāha is the foremost of all forms of union. The Manusmṛti (3:21-26) refers to the various societal views of gāndharva vivāha. According to one view, it is less desirable than some other types of marriage whereas according to another it is conducive to all sections to society.

The Baudhāyana Dharmasūtra(1:11:10-11) says that gāndharva vivāha is based on love and freewill and hence suitable to all sections of society except the Brāhmaṇa. Dharmaśāstras prescribe a restrictive lifestyle of penury and austerity to the Brāhmaṇa, who was not entitled to enjoy the same degree of freedom and indulgence granted the rest of society. Since gāndharva vivāha is based on love and freewill it would have been seen as sensual indulgence. Hence the Brāhmaṇa was not allowed it. The Nāradasmṛti (12:40-46) takes a more pragmatic approach and recognizes gāndharva vivāha as applicable to all sections of society including the Brāhmaṇa.

Gāndharva vivāha and the associated premarital sex found qualified acceptance in Hinduism in ancient times. Only later on it went out of vogue. This refutes the assertion that premarital sex is “against the tenets of every religion.”

So denying this truth and making it a taboo if talking about pre-marital sex, is really a big hypocrisy according to me where our tradition and ancient culture did show it to us various time. Isn't it ?So my answer is - 

premarital or posrmarital

YES if two adults are AGREEING with it because it is their own decision and mutual decision.
NO if it is against anyone's will ... because that is called RAPE  and nothing is as worst as this ANIMAL INSTINCT ... 

This article has been written down for Poonaam Uppal's True Love - A Mystical True Love Story on Flipkart and Indiblogger

Posted By Debarati Datta Read about me here blogging since 2011 Copyright © Debarati Datta Privacy Policy


  1. superb tales of past brought up very effectively well. Very impressive post.

  2. Yes, I agree with you..It's a taboo, an adult have full rights to do whatever he/she wants to do unless it's not harming anyone..But still, one question is not clear to me..Infact, I thought about this quite a few times, but did not land to any conclusion..If a guy does pre-marital sex with a girl with the promise that he will marry her later, should we consider it rape or not? Because, as per our current law, it's rape...I agree, it's a betrayal (in some cases, may not be), but should we call it rape?

    1. No Never ... Rape is something which is over one's adamant wish.. That is called to force the other to have union.. But if a man is having Pre-marital sex with one woman to show his promise of marrying her and then denies it.... then it must have to be called a harsh betrayal... because in this case the girl too got indulged in making love just thinking that he would marry... This is not Rape but this is painful Betrayal ... @anonymous .... I hope I could clear your question a bit...

      Thanks for commenting !!

  3. Good post. Although there is nothing wrong if two people desire to make love without marriage, they should think of the consequences which range from STDs to guilty feeling to undesired pregnancy. I have written a post about PMS at . Although I am not claiming that the viewpoint presented there is better than what you presented here, please do read it to know a different viewpoint.


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